Parents and school are equal partners working together to find ways to support children/young people and include their views.

The views of the child should be at the heart of any discussion.

The SEND Code of Practice 2015says:

“Parents know their children best and it is important that all professionals listen and understand when parents' express concerns about their child’s development. They should also listen to and address any concerns raised by children and young people themselves. (6.20)”

“Where a pupil is receiving SEN support, schools should talk to parents regularly to set clear outcomes and review progress towards them, discuss the activities and support that will help achieve them, and identify the responsibilities of the parent, the pupil and the school. Schools should meet parents at least three times each year. (6.65)”

“These discussions will need to allow sufficient time to explore the parents’ views and to plan effectively. (6.69)”

“The views of the pupil should be included in these discussions. This could be through involving the pupil in all or part of the discussion itself or gathering their views as part of the preparation. (6.70)”

Things you can do

Parent/carers know their child or young person best, they will have important information to share with the school, including strategies for how their child can be supported.

Often parent/carers are using strategies without even realising and it can be less confusing for a child or young person when the strategies at home and school are the same. 

Ideas for partnership working:

  • Note down key points and questions before any meeting with the school.
  • Both school and parent/carer willing and able to work together
  • Share the child or young person's strengths and what they enjoy
  • Note down anything the child or young person has said, their words are powerful and tell us a lot about how they feel.
  • Acknowledge each other's view and any support the school are offering.
  • It's important the parent/carer shares what they believe are their child or young person's main difficulties, but also what support and approaches they have found to help.

At the end of the meeting, it’s important that both parent/carers and the school know what will happen next. It can be reassuring to make an appointment there and then for a follow-up meeting so that support and progress will be reviewed.

 

For parent/carers

Ahead of any meeting it can be helpful to let school know what you would like to discuss:

Pre-meeting email template (Word document) 

Thinking about your questions

When you meet with school you will want to find out:

  • the progress your child has been making and
  • whether the support in place is having the desired impact, and if not,
  • what needs to change

Think about how to frame your questions before you meet with school, below are some ideas:

“What works well at home is…”

“Could we…?”

“Max responds well to…”

“Jess says they would find… helpful. Have I got that right Jess?”

“If you can’t do… what can you offer instead?”

“How can I support you in supporting my child

When things go wrong

The relationship between a parent and school can sometimes be tricky, for example where there is disagreement about the child or young person's rate of progress or the support they are receiving. 

It is helpful to talk to school as soon as possible so that the parent/carer can be reassured about what is happening. It could be that the planned support was not working and school have made some changes that they have not been told about, or maybe a temporary staffing issue due to illness. 

Sometimes staff are working on one of the agreed actions and intend to work on another action later, so as not to overwhelm a child or young person.  

It’s important to maintain a calm and friendly approach, a positive relationship with school will ultimately help the child or young person.